Without Its Bird

[Kim Soles]

She picked up the downy, reddish tipped feather off of the frosty earth.
Examining it in her right palm, it will never weigh any amount.

The air at rest mimicked the two hundred year old magnolia tree that bowed before her.
This feather is not for keeping she understood, and with lips pursed she blew ever so softly, imagining it dancing gracefully back to the land.

Not this feather.

Flying without its bird, swaying with sun trimmed edges, it floated upwards and higher than the black walnut tree, traveling a hundred paces and lifted her to a place she had never gone before.

[Bob Clay]

:-)
Great stuff.

[Teresa]

Kim, your "try" is done masterfully. Rethink your "tries" into a habit. After reading this I thought to myself, what about this technique can I take away with me to strengthen my writing? It takes the reader all the way down deep without any overdone effect; it's "just enough", and that's a very hard thing to pull off. You may just have that gift which, being easy for you, seems trivial. It's not.

[Kim Soles]

Thank you all. It can be tough writing about a magical moment. But I thought I would give it a try!

[Harry]

Beautiful Kim, love the idea of "Flying without its bird"

[Adam Byatt]

Quite evocative. I particularly like the second sentence.

[Teresa]

This is beautiful and brings back a related memory, a similar emotion. Lovely.