Six Sentences in a Life

[Will]

Slowly we pushed open the front door, the wood was splintered and jagged where the boot found its mark against the wooden jamb, all was quiet inside and dark.

As we entered we both felt the change though little in our line of work is routine we realized this was as far from routine as we could be.

Moving forward ever forward eyes sweeping every cranny every space straining against the darkness to spot a movement a silhouette anything to give us that slight edge we would need for survival.

Each new room a potential killing zone not knowing where the danger lay as we continued forward, we knew this wasn't for the faint of heart when we signed up but this tension and anticipation was excruciating and exhausting.

Finally we neared the last room, the rest of the rooms were behind us we both knew if there was to be a violent end to this it would be here we entered the room fast and low with deadly intent eyes alert bodies keyed to maximum with adrenaline flashing through our systems.

Turns out he or she was there and gone before we ever arrived, oh well, it's on to the next one for us now.

[Teresa]

Anxiety +.  Well done. 

[Jamie Hogan]

Seeing as how I'm not a huge fan of punctuation in the first place, I really enjoyed the pace of this. It added to the tension. Nice job.

[Stephen Torelli]

Sounds like a search and destroy mission... good job.

[Russo Lewis]

Neat scene.  Suspense all the way.  Wasn't sure if this was a 'chiller' or a police action.  The apprehension, the expectancy built fast. Nicely done. You wound it up with a bit of a cliff hanger but that's OK, I liked the scene for what it was meant to do, stand alone, neither a fore nor an aft to bracket it.  

[Will]

For Diana. Fact, just one part of my job.

[Angela]

Supreme anxiety for this reader.  Nice job.

[bolton carley]

wow.  the tension was great.  i felt like i was watching NCIS go in on a case. well done.

[Diana E. Backhouse]

I could feel the tension building in the first five sentences. The sixth left a lot of questions hanging in the air. Is this fact or fiction for one?