Sawing Logs

[Brian Holland]

For the life of him, Peter could not figure out why someone hadn’t invented a diesel chainsaw years ago. This thing could saw through ANYTHING! Little logs, big logs, skinny logs, fat logs, short logs, long logs, plastic logs, metal logs!! Metal logs? Peter opened his eyes and, as they adjusted to the darkness, realized that he was home in bed and had been dreaming. “Oh yeah, they don’t make diesel chainsaws”, he said as he looked at his wife, asleep next to him, “that’s what her snoring sounds like when she’s had too much to drink!”

[bolton carley]

oh, i bet you're in the doghouse for saying that!  like the title and the comparison between sleep and wood.