Remembering Frank Part 1

[Angela]

marvin’s entire body was pressed into the floor of the deer stand, and the grate of its surface reminded him of the rolls of fencing frank kept in the yard at the back of the hardware store, next to the mulch, and how at night, when downtown had closed up, they would stand among the links and wires and feel unbounded, and sometimes marvin would slip his fingers into the spaces among the taut cables there and squeeze his hand closed to feel the sharp ridges that told him of frank’s sometimes harsh hands, and it reminded him too, of later the way frank would take him by the wrists and pin him to the wall in the office in the hardware store there in the spot where marvin felt afraid they would turn over the copier and get caught. 

it was a game, perhaps.

frank liked to laugh at that, and they would drink bourbon and take turns shoving each other around in a rolling desk chair, whizzing past the hammers and hasps and trays of PVC joints, the only light being cast by the streetlights as it meandered through the rows of merchandise.

then frank would sit on a workbench and marvin would slouch in the secretary’s chair - until frank would come and touch marvin’s  jaws, with his thumbs pressed firmly in the tender spot under marvin’s chin, and he would tell marvin how to take down his pants, exactly the way he liked it, as he stood there over marvin, giving orders without saying a word.  frank would keep that pressure under marivin’s chin, tilting marvin’s head almost uncomfortably back, holding him firmly along the sides of his neck and using that pressure to direct marvin’s movement.

that specific memory was what called marvin to the gun, the loss of that special guiding pressure he had felt and loved, and the way he almost got it back as he pushed the nose of the gun up under his chin, and the missing fullness he felt again in his mouth, when he placed the barrel of it inside, and let his tongue warm the steel.

[Brittany]

I'm with Mike!

[Stephen Torelli]

Delicate writing but not a delicate topic. This is not Mayberry.

[Harry]

Something cool in that line about standing among the rolls of fence and feeling unbound. Very interesting, going to see what happens in part 2.

[Mike Handley]

Please don't kill Marvin.

[Gita]

I like the streetlight meandering down the aisles and playing in the rolling chair. I find those details wholly original.

[Kristine_ES]

i'm just still in awe that no matter the subject, angela writes delicately. even horseplay.  keep going.

[Robert Crisman]

Dominance and submission for sure. Self-loathing? Could be. In any case, it's nothing to worry about because it ain't over till it's over, which it will be, of course, if Marvin pulls the trigger. Keep on writing this, Angela; hopefully, Marvin will plumb the depths of his pain and find a reason to keep keeping on. Frank is what he is...

[Angela]

@T - Frank and Marvin basically engaged in some rough play by mutual consent, with Frank taking the upper hand.  I can see how this could be interpreted as you see it, particularly since Marvin's more submissive role might lead the reader to see him in the light of a victim.

It worries me that I have written something that would turn dear Marvin into a self-loathing man.  He is heartbroken and desperate.  And he loved the style of interaction he had with Frank.

There is more to see coming soon.  Hope you will stick with.

[Teresa]

I can't even begin to know if these activities came with real love or if Frank just wanted someone to play with.  I get the feeling that Frank hated his own attraction to men and coped by punishing these men.  And it seems Marvin was more than willing to hate himself.