New Neighbour

[Bob Clay]

I was away on holiday when the new neighbours moved in so I didn't see any of them. But standing in my local pub on the day I arrived back some people I knew presented me with a petition, "You should sign that," they told me, "after all you live next door to them." I brushed it off, I've never like petitions much, if I've got something to say I'll say it, I don't want my opinions written down by someone else and used for their purposes.

So next day I'm mowing the lawns and my new neighbour called me over to introduce himself, "I'm sorry to say there's some dislike of our being here," he told me, "I'm not sure they're ready to welcome black people around here yet, I hope this doesn't cause you trouble."

I leaned forward and looked into his eyes, there was ten thousand years of Africa in his face-bones, hair and skin colour, "You're not black are ya ?" I asked, and tried hard not let let the corners of my mouth turn up. He looked a little confused for a second, then burst out laughing, we both laughed long and hard for 10 minutes and I was aware of curtains twitching in nearby houses but what the hell, if you can't have a good laugh with your new neighbour, what can you have ? ... it was their loss.

[Pamila Payne]

But it has such a happy ending, and that's what overcomes the sorry state of human un-evolution.

[Bob Clay]

I've based it on a true incident in my life, some years ago. But not where I live now, (the Cornish are ok, they just hate everybody who isn't Cornish .... (joke)). I've changed some of the detail to avoid unpleasantness, but the underlying story is true. Alas we humans are a pretty sorry bunch, if you see two blackbirds fighting over the worming rights on your lawn, they're doing it because their survival depends on it. We humans would probably burn the lawn and kill everything within a mile radius ..... sad aint it ?