Maple Syrple on Short Stack

[Brad Rose]

Buddy’s not too big, but he looks a lot taller than he is—especially when he’s mad and standin’ up.   When he saw Mr. Army Pants was makin’ Ms. Pancakes cry, he shot up from his chair, sprinted over, an  wedged himself in between the disputing parties.

 

 “Whoa, wait a minute, can’t we just talk this out, using our library voices?”

 

Mr. Army Pants was madder than a stubbed toe , and he yelled, “Mind your own business, Elmo, this here’s my ex-wife, and I’ll yell at her if I damned well want to.”

 

He was just about to punch Buddy (so he was kinda distracted), when I snuck up behind him and poured Buddy’s remaining carafe of maple syrup all over the guy’s head.  Needless to say, Mr. Army Pants didn’t like being doused like a short stack of silver dollar pancakes, and I’m sorry to report, he expressed his disappointment by turning around and punching me several times before I heard the manager yell at Mr Army Pants, from behind the counter, “Hey, you’d better get out of here Pal, I called the cops and they’ll be here any second.

[Sandra Davies]

'our library voices'  brilliant, and the whole series sparking such entertaining comments too.   I love Gita's LBSFS and hope to remember it, because in my experience, the great majority of short men are pompous rats - definitely NOT cute.

[Teresa]

LBSFS -- I've dated several men with this.  I don't know what it is about me and little men.  I guess they're....cute...or something.  Anyway, this is wonderful, and the Mr. Army Pants and Ms. Pancakes was perfect to give us the whole of this couple in a flash image.  I was thinking the carafe would be filled with coffee too, but you knew better.  These guys don't fight that dirty.  And you're right about them being heroes.

[Brad Rose]

@ Gita--LBSFS. that's hillarious!  I hope I can remember the acronymn, for future use.

[Gita]

Mr Army Pants has what the former Speaker Pro Tem of the Alabama House of Representatives used to call LBSFS: Little Bitty Short Fucker Syndrome. So his punches were probably kinda mid-low body area, and that's better than the schnoz.  Am loving this series, although, you ARE writing this perilously close to the Pancake Palace in Hayneville , second home of the Shiners.

[Robert Crisman]

These two guys are a-ok. I'm with Mike; hot coffee would have been just the ticket for that rumpkin doglick.

[Brad Rose]

Thanks Ron and Mike.  These guys make quite a duo, I think. 

Just because these characters didn't become astronauts doesn't mean they aren't heros. 

 

[Mike Handley]

Aw, I hate that Mr. Army pants got in some punches. I was kinda hoping the carafe were filled with hot coffee, too. But "library voices" and the stumped toe analogy were immensely satisfying.

[Ron. Lavalette]

This woulda never happened at Cafe Tranquility Base.  Or at least the syrup woulda poured differently due to the decreased gravity & it being reconstituted, like Tang and all.

This is great stuff, BR.