What can YOU say in six sentences?
I was so bad when I was a kid my mother sold me to Gypsies; they sued, took our house, and I tarred their driveway.
I was so bad I grew horns and Father Flotsky condemned me to hell; the devil fled back to La Jolla.
I was so bad that Santa came down the chimney and took all my shit.
So bad that they brought back the chair--in Mama Lou's daycare on 12th Street.
So bad that Capone went to church.
So bad that the Crips took up knitting, the Bloods joined the Boy Scouts, the Hulk had a sex change, and Dick Cheney stopped eating babies...