What can YOU say in six sentences?
Sandra Bullock won an Oscar, The Wire never won an Emmy, and Public Enemy was right about the Grammys.
But sometimes it can be fun to watch the ceremonies with the sound muted, thereby disabling the breathless acceptance speeches, the tedious jokes (self-referential, politically smug, tone-deaf), and leaving only the discomfited flailing of the presenters as they try (unsuccessfully) to maintain some shred of dignity.
Middle America may wax smartass about gays and elites, but few are immune to the hi-def hypnotist, the IMAX experience. We live in a world where our dominant cultural intake is passively visual, and these are after all our cathartic avatars. They suffer majestically and rebound heroically, take our revenge for us, kill who we want to kill, screw who we want to screw, and then deliver the bon mot with impeccable timing (no matter how many takes it takes).
So it can be instructive to see how our professional escapists rank themselves, what they choose to glorify at this particular historical moment--just as long as you don't listen to what they're actually saying.