"Give and Take" by Harry Sanderford

[Robert McEvily]

Having found himself incapable of effecting the necessary reparations, Malkovich resolved to dismantle his alley prize. His intention was to harvest the lazer and some of the many small motors from inside and reassemble them as a kind of mutant kinetic lazerium. He envisioned a robotic configuration that when placed beaming and whirling beneath a mottled glass bowl would transform his ceiling and walls into an extragalactic extravaganza. This new idea excited him even more than the original prospect of once again listening to his small CD collection had when he first discovered the old Sony. Sadly just as he'd commenced calculating counter cohesion coeficients, (hammer selection) Bradley "the brain" Buzzkill dropped by and informed him that the lazers he sought were not to be found in the belly of no ordinary alley audio. Deflated, Malkovich wondered at the conspiring forces of the universe while Bradley, not usually known for his glass-half-full disposition, passed a joint saying,"Good place to hide your weed though Dude."

6S

Harry Sanderford is a Central Florida surfing cowboy who'd sooner spin yarns than mend fences.

[Olive Rosehips]

Wow, this is positively cosmic! Love it, Harry! Dazzling!

[Harry]

Thanks Pamila, I wasn't familiar with "Mondo2000" so I had to do a little surfing and I found that a spoof of it was "In Homerpalooza, a 1996 episode of The Simpsons, Homer chances upon an adolescent shopkeep who reads a "Mondo 2000"-spoof entitled "Mondo Frowno". " Malkovich and Bradley could do alot worse that to grace the pages of a defunkt publication worthy of The Simpson's spoofing. But I think the SciFi channel's reaching for these two, maybe Jackass.

[Pamila Payne]

Malkovich and Bradley deserve at least a half hour time slot on the SciFi channel, or a comic in a magazine like Mondo2000 used to be.

[Harry]

Thanks A.K. Your abilities light and dazzlewise come to me as no surprise.

[Harry]

Some of them can be found in the dictionary, the rest I just make up. Thanks Sugar!

[Zelda Martin]

Lazer, schmazer! If the weed's good, and you smoke enough of it, you can experience an inter-cranium "extragalactic extravaganza," and you won't have to calculate any "counter cohesion coefficients" first.