What can YOU say in six sentences?
“No ’oblem,” said the twentysomething waitress, scooping up the plate of waffles smothered in rancid blueberries. She returned moments later, big sounds escaping her curiously almost-closed mouth: “Uh anager says e’ll ake em off uh ill.”
“What?” I asked.
“Thank you very much,” my wife smiled, seemingly oblivious to the girl’s impediment, while I fought wild urges to ask Waitress Boo Boo if her tongue was newly pierced or if she’d had a root canal that morning.
I tried not to stare, but the gravitational pull — like trying to pretend someone doesn’t have a dime-sized mole on their forehead — was too great.
This formidable girl, a linebacker underneath a taut and stained blue apron, had a tiny baby-doll mouth, or one better suited for a bad caricature of an anemic English woman (or French man) beneath a powdered wig.