Scarlett Rose's Blog – October 2008 Archive (10)

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Right side up.

Sitting on the green, freshly mowed grass on my front lawn, I blew bubbles of soap into the sky, deeply concentrating and intensly watching the colours swirl as the sunlight shone down on these perfect circles. Slowly I craned my head to the left, turning it until the world was upside down - and a giggle escaped between my lips.

Standing up quickly, I made the foolish decision to flip myself onto my hands until I was in a perfect straight line, many years of training had enabled me to… Continue

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 30, 2008 at 4:47am — 6 Comments

...

Sometimes I stand next to you, my head barely reaching up to your shoulder and I feel inferior - I think I wonder if you even realise I'm there.

So often you give me butterflies and I don't know if it's because I'm scared of you or if I'm falling in love without really realising what I'm doing, but just so you know, I crave your presence. And I think I will continue to let my hand linger on yours, creating that special electricity between us, the one i love, the one i fell for - the one… Continue

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 28, 2008 at 5:30am — 5 Comments

Perfection..

i think i would give up half my life to see something perfect, to experience something perfect, to touch something perfect - and once i see it, experience it or reach out and touch it, i want to bottle it up and keep it forever -- possibly hide it under my bed and guard it with my life because whatever it is, it's a once in a lifetime opportunity.



i crave perfection because it's what i can't have - no one in this world can have it. We strive for what we can't have and when we don't… Continue

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 25, 2008 at 6:30am — 11 Comments

Discombobulated :)

I'm one of those annoying people who always has to ask your opinion, quite possibly on the same issue at least three times a day and if I don't like your opinion the first time, i'll push you to change it. I like things my way all the time, and if it doesn't go how it should then please watch out because you may get hurt. I'm not even bothering to sit here and write a garbage story that I wouldn't have any clue how to write anyway, but I'm going to try and somehow get the thoughts in my head… Continue

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 20, 2008 at 7:00am — 4 Comments

Twisted memories..

When it first happened, I was way too scared to open my mouth and tell those around me. I knew that as soon as I did, I would be classed as different, that they would look down on me with pity and they would try to avoid the topic as much as possible. They say "look, it isn't your fault", and I know that because I had no idea what was happening. But that doesn't make me not guilty because I was there and still didn't have the guts to open my mouth. You can't forget… Continue

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 18, 2008 at 7:05am — 5 Comments

Mute.

Drunk with fatigue and damaged with truth,
Memories forgotten and drifting aloof.
Who's to define it, who gains the role -
Who's to prove who has control?
Walking slowly, lingering back,
Closer to gaining what one does lack.
My heart is screaming - I have nothing,
But when I'm with you - that's when I gain something.
I'm afraid to open my mouth and speak -
In a moment of strength, still I am weak.

Please, please listen.

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 17, 2008 at 7:42am — 2 Comments

It's questionable...

I have only six sentences to tell you how I feel - that is, six sentences of crap, compiled together.



There's not really much to say, there's not much you can know. I can speculate, I could tell you what's going to happen but I don't know and that alone scares the hell out of me.



I could tell you that my stomach turns when I think of those days, or that butterflies flutter gently when your name is whispered. I could tell you what you want to hear.



But even I… Continue

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 17, 2008 at 6:47am — 6 Comments

Out of control.

Dancing, I feel the rough carpet spinning beneath my feet. I feel the music pulsing through my body.
I feel myself gasping for air, clinging to truth. I'm lost, I am dizzy and I am feeling out of control.

For once, I feel. So I continue to dance and am enveloped into a world where nothing matters, where no one has a chance to control anything.

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 16, 2008 at 7:46am — 7 Comments

False sense of beauty.

Those days, when you feel so beautiful in your colourful scarf and your carefully crafted face. Staring into the mirror, you begin to appreciate what you have, what you can't change.

And you're content.

But no sooner than you leave the house, the feeling vanishes and you are robbed. Gasping, you spin, you feel NAKED.

And you realise you're just plain and simple.

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 16, 2008 at 7:19am — 4 Comments

Mistaken.

My mask, my façade - it slips away. One day, masked and the next- forgotten, broken, written in the sky for everyone to gaze upon. Their stares, they haunt me, they wound me.
But I feel free.

I will wait for you to give up, one day soon - I know this full well.

And then we can leave this place.

Added by Scarlett Rose on October 16, 2008 at 6:49am — 4 Comments

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