Paul de Denus's Blog – August 2011 Archive (13)

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Circle Jerk

I don’t like the guy. He always shows up when I’m relaxing with my close circle of friends. The others don’t seem to mind. I find him a bit standoffish at first but the more beers we pound, well the more vocal he gets. Then it’s all about him and what he’s done and what he’s going to do and who he’s screwed and who he’s gonna’ screw and well… all the rest. I need to learn to keep my mouth shut.

Added by Paul de Denus on August 27, 2011 at 1:33pm — 5 Comments

A Rare Southern Dish

Who’s in our kitchen stirring up the pot, preparing a rare Southern dish? For starters, a broth, sea-foam froth, a rich emerald green soup slowly brought to boil. Now simmering, blanched timbers are tossed in, with splashes of sand and brine. In-seasoned salt and pepper rain and hints of gusty seaweed, palm and magnolia, added for effect. As it’s served, the pan handles too hot and it’s dropped on our lap - didn’t order…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 25, 2011 at 8:40pm — 1 Comment

Six Questions a Serial Killer May Ask A Real Estate Agent

*Is there a basement?

 

*Does it come with a refrigerator?

 

*What are the next-door neighbors like?

 

*How big is the bathtub?

 

*Is there a neighborhood watch?

 

*Can I buy you a cup of coffee?

Added by Paul de Denus on August 22, 2011 at 5:51pm — 6 Comments

Inanimate Friends- Sandra’s Challenge

A Martin guitar, to play

 

An I-Pad, to do everything on

 

A cat, to talk to

 

A baseball glove and rubber ball to bounce and catch, for exercise

 

Paint brushes, canvas and gesso to create

 

A set of Ping golf clubs, to cry over

Added by Paul de Denus on August 22, 2011 at 11:26am — 6 Comments

Boy, Scouts 2

Barry Friel brought a pocketknife. He says it’s okay; all Boy Scouts have them. I don’t have one. Outside, several of us play ‘knifey’… you know, where you throw the knife in the ground and the guy opposite you has to stretch his foot or hand to that spot, then take the knife and throw it near another guy and make him bend for it without falling down and then knife it back at you. Scoutmaster Mr. Piedmont had himself a…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 19, 2011 at 10:59pm — 4 Comments

Boy, Scouts

So I’m part of the pack now, the Cobra pack. I’m a full-fledged member, not one of those little cub crybabies anymore. That’s for the new kids, beginners. Our pack is cool, even has designated colors: orange and black. They handed out same color epaulettes too for our uniforms and a small pin with a wolf’s head on it. I wonder if we get any sort of weaponry.…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 19, 2011 at 3:56pm — 4 Comments

MudSpot Alert

For those who have not, check out Michael B's MudSpot site
https://mudspots.wordpress.com/

-some great writing from Joe, Sandra, Mike H, Gita, Bill L, Bill F, Nicole, Amy, Grey, Travis, Kristine & Michael B

Added by Paul de Denus on August 18, 2011 at 5:40pm — 9 Comments

Gone Baby Gone

This place, which I found on the Internet circa 1964, no longer exists. It was a military base out in the middle of Canadian dry prairie and wheat fields. We lived there three years, during my early teens... eighth, ninth and tenth grades.…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 16, 2011 at 10:03pm — 8 Comments

The Color of Warm and Cold

I exit the building onto River Avenue and flip my collar high around my ears, pulling my neck in like a turtle in his shell. The café is only half a block downstream but I’m a frozen fish when I arrive. At the counter, I order a large mocha house blend and wheat toast. “To go please,” I tell the girl, “with extra butter and cream.” She is shy and plump and moves like…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 15, 2011 at 7:48pm — 3 Comments

An American Dream

He lay inside the entrance of a cave high above the humming forest as rainfall drummed its timeless tune on the canopy below. Lightning cracked the night sky, releasing a blazing crooked finger that tickled straight into the ground. He wondered if it was that of an invisible being, just poking around, testing the earth to see if it would still breathe life or crumble to the touch.…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 12, 2011 at 11:31am — 6 Comments

Making The Callx3

The call came from a man I’d never met. He apologized and started to explain; I interrupted saying, yes, I understood who he was, that his brother had mentioned his name to me. He said he had made several attempts to phone his seventy-year-old sibling - Thursday through Saturday specifically - but there had been no response; he was a little concerned. “Would you mind going down to his house and checking on him?” I am a…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 7, 2011 at 10:12am — 1 Comment

I’m Not In Love- Jess Jones Challenge

I met a girl, snowball in hell, she was hard and as cracked as the Liberty Bell.

 

We went up to the top of the highest hill and stopped… still.

 …

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 2, 2011 at 10:24pm — 4 Comments

How To Prevent an Annoying Bee - Challenge

Inform them there is a 3-mile No-Fly Zone around you that includes dragons, dragonflies, horseflies, mosquitoes, pterodactyls, bats and bees.

 

Stay on your cell phone while outside as cell phone signals will kill them.…

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Added by Paul de Denus on August 1, 2011 at 5:16pm — 4 Comments

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