You were a crass political opportunist.  You knew that if you got the newspapers on your side, you could dominate public opinion, and to hell with what the scientists or those other elitist commie-types might say.  Citizen Kane had your back, the doper hysteria fed into his own agenda, he had his "rosebud" and the undesirables had their green buds and you wrote that "Jazz grew up next door to crime," and we all know there's certain types we don't want living next door, like those Hollywood…

I was a Dallas Cowboys fan for about five minutes, a hiccup of loyalty born of two Marker's Mark Bourbon and Diet Coke cocktails, but a question burned away the fog of imagined team spirit: What Is Football? During the last game I attended my mind was flooded with images of soldiers at war, homelessness, world hunger, disease, poverty, our dying Social Security fund and the national deficit all juxtaposed with the expense of attending a football game -- the $300+ tickets, $15 kobe…