Clarence stopped painting long enough to belt out the refrain to the Dells’ “Oh, What a Night,” dotting four invisible i-s with his brush to the line “I ... love ... you ... so” and clasping the turtle (tail end) to his Buddha belly.

He then tossed back a large swig of zinfandel -- what his merlot-loving ex-wife used to call “pink gayboy wine” -- and resumed his masterpiece du jour, Dick Cheney’s scowling face, on the…