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What can YOU say in six sentences?

Dude A Bydes
  • Male
  • Indianapolis, IN
  • United States
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on Thursday
Would that be bee-atch as in tee-atch? The more things change...
on Thursday
on Thursday
Brownie: There are universes within the atoms of that styrofoam Big Mac box. There is drama and suspense in the mind of the cab driver drinking coffee in the corner booth. There great humor in the internal dialogue of those drivers waiting in line...
on Thursday
Brownie: Intriguing selections--they pulled me into the larger piece. I liked the layers of conversation and innuendo. Your subtle style grabs my thought like a waft of that girl's perfume that just walked by me. -Dude
on Thursday
OOOOOH! B.R. I gotta' wife like that too. The other night I asked my wife if she wanted to do it "doggy style?" She told me, "Sure, you can roll over and I'll play dead." -Dude
on Thursday
Geez! B.R., That's deep stuff... Sorta' like "If the Pope falls in the forest does he make a noise?" Hell, I don't know, I'm just the Dude.
on Thursday
Headline: Man Bites Dog! ...no big deal at this place! Did they offer "doggie bags" to take home... no wait! Don't even consider that question, Daniel. We pig out on swine--why not woof down some wolf? Monkey brains... hog nuts? I guess it's more ...
on Thursday

Profile Information

Relationship Status:
Married
About Me:
Words... kids... bills... words...bills... kill...words. Enough about me, how about you? So much to say... so much to say...so much to say. None of it matters and all of it matters. How does a dude know which lobe to enter? Open up my head and let me out...Little babiee!
Website:
http://www.playlist.com/DudeAbydes

But seriously folks...

Nothing sucks quite so bad as a guy who can't smile when his fly is open... unless he makes a living that way. People just take everything so seriously... It's like what I told my shrink, "Doc, I really think I'm becoming a dog." He laughed and told me to get off the couch, then charged me $150. You see what I mean... that's what's wrong with our world--people just can't seem to take a little joke. You want another example... here's what I'm talking about-- today some friends told me that they considered themselves products of the sixties...you know: peace marching, protests, sit-ins, and end-the-war rallies. I told them I was too... I got high and screwed hippies. Geez! you woulda' thought a couple of nuns could appreciate that kind of honesty, but nooooo! Now I'm wondering who pissed in their holy water!? Any way, Father Dennis liked it. -Dude
Check out my wicked playlist at:
http://www.playlist.com/DudeAbydes

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Dude A Bydes

Monon II ("The World's Loudest Mime")


Okay, I've been standing by this crappy bridge wearing this stupid white face for three hours. I'm as popular as an albino leper and so far I've made a total of seven quarters, three dimes, and a nickel... Being a mime in Broad Ripple sucks!
"Oh look, Terry... a mime!"
"Yeah, I hate mimes--they're st… Continue

Posted on November 10, 2009 at 9:52pm — 6 Comments

Dude A Bydes

With a Name Like Ho, She's Got to be Good! (bilingual/bi-sixer)

Only Westview Middle School would think to hire a naturalized Vietnamese-American named Dung Ho to teach ENL English to a bunch of Westside Latino mini-bangers... but there she was... in front of her class of future Seranos, Nortenos and Crips. An absurd scene--still, you had to admit this woman had brass banh...

"Vincente, what IS Dean doing in the picture?"
"No comprende'"(muttered giggles).
"VINCENTE, I ask you a question... look at the picture. You will answer, now, please."
"Dean es… Continue

Posted on November 10, 2009 at 8:58pm — 4 Comments

Dude A Bydes

Monon


"Straight lines are only good for testing drunks," Dad always said. I guess the old man oughta' know--he spent his time in the tank plenty of nights after driving home on his "rocket fuel." Those hours of waiting up with Mom till the call would come after midnight taught me one important lesson though: men… Continue

Posted on November 4, 2009 at 10:17pm — 10 Comments

Dude A Bydes

After Wings... (a sonnet for Tess)


"...What's that?" she asked at the quivering sign.
"Just a dying bird," he replied, "with a broken wing."
"Oh! I want it to live... I'll make it mine."
"Just leave it alone--it's a natural thing."

"Besides the poor thing will never again fly."
"But God wants it to soar, not just hobble around."… Continue

Posted on October 16, 2009 at 6:05pm — 7 Comments

Dude A Bydes

Number 32 Relief--a DDS (Dentist Double Sixer)


"Okay, Morgan there you go--I capped number 32 and filled the cavity in the root... I also tightened your implant up front."
"Thankh, Doc... uh'm feelin' uh whole lot beddah..."
"You know you oughta' floss back there, Morgan--that plaque really builds up on those wisdom teeth."
"Hahhd ta reach back theh, Doc… Continue

Posted on October 16, 2009 at 5:00pm — 3 Comments

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At 3:53am on November 12, 2009, KAWFEEEE! said…
ok gotcha. I figured we're on the same wavelength. I'm hangin', Dude, I'm hangin'. As for Phillip, forget 'day', "go ahead punk, make my decade..."
At 11:06pm on November 11, 2009, Jeanette Cheezum said…
Dude, you always brighten my day.
At 8:29pm on November 11, 2009, CJT said…
Thanks for the awesome comment! I really enjoy reading your stuff as well, as of late I've been a little sidetracked, but I think I'm getting back into it... we'll see. Anyway, thanks again!
At 7:50pm on November 10, 2009, Absolutely*Kate said…
DUDE!!!

Where's the cool stooging YANKS gift you yelped me about so doggone sweetly. I'm all a'tingle in anticipatory splendour and don't know where you hid your little black book, nor your big black book for that matter - both of which I'm sure suspend time as we know it and evoke *magic*. ~ Breathlessly, Abby*K (who of course will thankyou mighty purty nice - but I don't know where what I'm s'posed to find is hiding . . .
At 5:39pm on November 10, 2009, Dude A Bydes added a gift to their profile…
In honor of Mother Brown 1934-1996.
From the Gift Store
At 3:03pm on October 31, 2009, Absolutely*Kate said…

Tricks to your Treats and scaring up all the haunts you taunt. ~ Absolutely Spooky*Kate
At 4:25am on October 29, 2009, Absolutely*Kate said…

Dude Bogart ~ Through the mists I saw your message. I smiled. I sensated. I shimmied ~ like my sister Kate, absolutely. This *APPARITION* thanks you Schweetheart for giving a ghost*writer the perchance of your glance. ~ Mary?
At 8:44am on October 18, 2009, Scarlett Rose said…
Hey Dude --

So I just read your comment on Renee's first blog - the 'Fuck Beauty' one (I feel so BAD swearing, I'm sorry) and your comment there tugged at my heart. I kind of really appreciate that comment. A lot. I'm not sure why, really. It just got to me.

Anyway.
Enjoy your week.

Scarlett x
At 1:57am on October 17, 2009, KAWFEEEE! said…
Sorry for the one-mess-fits-all, but I got blisters on my fingers tryin' to get the latest word out to y'all so you can help me live in a manner to which I'd like to become accustomed.

Hot off the cyber press, 20 years in the making (gawd, I'm not a very prolific writer, am I?) I finally got it done.

...The Twain Shall Meet, by: yours truly

"If you're a Twain fan you'll love it. If not, you will be"

https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/4837

And if you act now I'll include my gastrointestinal gourmet cookbook, absolutely free (if you don't already have it). but wait, there's more.... free weekend in Manila -- bring your own dinghy.

KAWFEEE
 
 

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